Sometimes when someone is describing a movie to someone who might be on the fence about it, they might say something like, “Yes, it’s a kids’ movie, but it’s made for adults. So much of the humor will go straight over a child’s head.” This rarely, if ever, works and can be a terrible tactic. Yet, here I find myself again writing a review for a movie that I knew I was not going to enjoy (though I knew I would see it regardless because of the hype, favorable review, and gnawing curiosity) under the pretense that the movie was made for me when it was not. However, that was not the half of it. With most animated films, children are likely to be entertained and understand the story, even if that story parallels an overarching story intended more to reach adults. Greta Gerwig’s (Lady Bird, Little Women) Barbie had all the shininess of Mattel’s most iconic toy and was often shot in such a simplistic way that it felt like it was perhaps aimed toward children, but this was not a kids’ movie. Its clever and ubiquitous marketing campaign seemed more interested in selling out as many theaters as possible for as long as possible before revealing its plot. It did work. The film grossed over $150 million domestically in its first three days. To the film’s credit, it was a PG-13 film, though I bought into the intrigue so much that I hadn’t even looked at the rating until I left the theater.

First, the good. The production design was outstanding. The sets, both in Barbieland and the real world, had the glitz and glamour that would be expected in a film about Barbie. The casting was spot on. Margot Robbie (Once Upon a Time in Hollywood, Bombshell) might be the actress that comes to mind if asked, “Which actress would make a great Barbie?” Thin. Tall. Long blonde hair. Clear complexion. Beautiful smile. Sparkly blue eyes. Visual perfection. All the females in Barbieland were named Barbie. There was Doctor Barbie, President Barbie, Journalist Barbie, Lawyer Barbie, Activist Barbie, Diplomat Barbie, and many others. Robie was appropriately named Stereotypical Barbie. An equally as perfect choice for Ken (or at least the central Ken) was Ryan Gosling (Crazy, Stupid, Love. First Man). With his beach blonde hair, square jaw, rock-hard abs, and effortless smile, he’s the type of person who comes to mind when we think of a lifeguard hunk. It’s no surprise that Gosling’s Ken is, of course, a lifeguard.

We spend the first day with Barbie in Barbieland. Every day in Barbieland is perfect. Barbie wakes up refreshed from a restful sleep. The weather is ideal. There’s no traffic. Everyone says hello to each other. There’s not a problem in the world. The Kens of the world rely on the Barbies. Nights are spent living it up like rockstars before the next day repeats itself, over and over and over again. Only until one day, it’s not. Stereotypical Barbie starts to feel different and begins to question her existence. Convinced by Weird Barbie (a miscast Kate McKinnon – Yesterday, Ghostbusters) to enter the real world and find the girl who plays with her to clear up any misconceptions. Hoping along for the ride to present-day Venice Beach is the trusty Ken. Though the humor was a big miss, I enjoyed the initial culture clash of Barbie and Ken rollerblading down a California boardwalk. It’s not long from there that we come to know Gerwig’s take on the movie and swipe at society. Barbie meets Gloria (America Ferrera – The Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants, Lords of Dogtown) and her middle-school-aged daughter Sasha, a mother and daughter who played with Stereotypical Barbie until Sasha outgrew the doll and its unrealistic standards of beauty.

While there is an audience for Barbie, it doesn’t feel like it will span generations. Gerwig attempts to cram humor, drama, and adventure into a film that clocks in at under two hours. It sometimes felt rushed and dragged at others,  which is not a sign of a great movie. When the film wanted to, it attacked American patriarchy, particularly through the use of Will Ferrell (Old School, Talladega Nights) as the miscast CEO of Mattel. He was never funny or threatening. I believe he was supposed to be one or the other in some fashion. Instead, he was just 2023 Will Ferrell. Either that or a shell of who Will Ferrell was when he was funny a decade prior. His bloated performance and mere presence hindered the film more than it helped. His character, along with the half a dozen clones that followed his every move, stifled Stereotypical Barbie’s self-discovery in the real world.

Though ambitious, Barbie struggled to achieve any real semblance. I struggled to connect with this movie beyond its dumbed-down and exaggerated rhetoric. I often felt confused and frustrated by its inability to transition between comedic and dramatic elements. I didn’t learn anything I didn’t know coming in, making the experience even less enjoyable. Had this movie been released 15-20 years ago and told in the same style, it may have been revolutionary for some people. Instead, it reiterated a narrative that, while super important, has become commonplace over the last decade.

Plot 6/10
Character Development 6/10
Character Chemistry 6/10
Acting 8/10
Screenplay 5/10
Directing 6/10
Cinematography 10/10
Sound 8/10
Hook and Reel 5.5/10
Universal Relevance 7.5/10
68%

C

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