As long as there is an opportunity for profit, classic movies will continue to be redone, rebooted, and have unneeded sequels attached. That is a fact of life. If you hope this doesn’t happen to your favorite movie because you don’t want the original tarnished, don’t hold your breath. It’s not a question of if but a matter of when. The original Texas Chainsaw Massacre (released in 1974 and directed by Tobe Hooper – Salem’s Lot, Poltergeist) is one of those classics. It’s a film beloved by critics and audiences alike. It’s become a cult movie that almost all moviegoers (horror fans or not) will undoubtedly see at least once. When we hear the name Leatherface, we instantly visualize a deformed madman chasing unsuspecting teens through the woods with a chainsaw. There have been and will continue to be sequels, remakes, and other movies that hope to ride the coattails of the original Texas Chainsaw Massacre.

Marcus Nispel (Friday the 13th, Conan the Barbarian) directs the 2003 version of the movie. Jessica Biel (The A-Team, The Illusionist) as protagonist Erin Hardesty, one of five friends cruising in a van through the heart of Texas on a hot, sunny afternoon smoking weed and having an all-around good time. Their fun ends when the group decides to pitch up a young girl on the side of the road who tells each of them that they aren’t safe and kills herself with a gunshot through her mouth. At this point, the group has to decide what to do with the body. They hunt down Hoyt, the town sheriff (R Lee Ermey – Full Metal Jacket, Mississippi Burning), but this man doesn’t exactly enforce his law by the book. He’s got the kids fearing for their lives without minutes of meeting him.

The group gets split up, and, like its predecessor, the deranged Leatherface soon gets hold of them and starts dismembering each piece by piece. His victims include Andy (Mike Vogel – Cloverfield, Poseidon), Kemper (Eric Balfour – In Her Shoes, Lie With Me), and Pepper (Erica Leerhsen). Meanwhile, Erin is doing her best to stay alive, trying to outrun and outwit Leatherface while still wondering if she can help her friends. Along the way, she meets up with some strange locals who are more part of the movie to try and freak us out than anything else.

Rather than making Leatherface and his clan the movie’s real villains, Nispel divides up the terror by making Leatherface and Hoyt lead killers. Though he takes the time to build up the five teenagers and tries to make them appear as individuals rather than just pawns, we don’t care when they get snatched up. Maybe it is because we expect them to be terrorized and killed, or perhaps we haven’t become invested enough in any of the characters. Regardless, we know what is going to happen. The process is formulaic. Leatherface is the legend; thus, we know he will get them all. As a result, the suspense is limited.

All in all, it’s not a horrible remake. It could have been much worse. This was my second time seeing it. It was a movie I was glad that I saw in the theater. It’s not a movie that needs more than one viewing. I saw the original some years ago, and that version is better. The visuals in this remake are well done—Leatherface’s house has a creepy feel. The whole town is a bit eerie. They did an excellent job with that. Unfortunately, that is the only aspect of the film that surpasses the original. If you can only see one of the many versions/sequels of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, see the 1974 original.

Plot 6/10
Character Development 5/10
Character Chemistry5/10
Acting 6/10
Screenplay 5/10
Directing  7/10
Cinematography 10/10
Sound 6/10
Hook and Reel 8/10
Universal Relevance 4/10
62%

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