Lisa Cholodenko’s critically acclaimed 2010 film The Kids Are All Right shows that the rawest of human emotions cannot be limited by age, race, gender, disability, social status, or, as in this movie, sexual orientation. In this movie, Nic (Annette Bening – American Beauty, Being Julia) and Jules (Julianne Moore – Still Alice, Far From Heaven) are lifelong partners, raising two children with the same sperm donor, Paul (Mark Ruffalo – Foxcatcher, Spotlight). Joni (Mia Wasikowska – Alice in Wonderland, Crimson Peak) is the 18-year-old daughter Nic carried, while Jules is the birth mother of 15-year-old son Laser (Josh Hutcherson – The Hunger Games, Journey to the Center of the Earth).

The story revolves around the family of Nic, Jules, Joni, and Laser. It is understood and accepted by not only the children but also the community that Nic and Jules are a lesbian couple raising the two children together. Joni and Laser call Nic and Jules’ moms, and the kids go to each of their respective parents for particular problems, much like a child in a traditional family might go to his father for one issue or his mother for another. And just like any child-raising couple, Nic and Jules have unique parenting traits. Nic is a doctor, the clear breadwinner of the family, who tries to be stricter with the children and the more controlling half of the partnership, whereas Jules is a bit more laid back, more irresponsible, and far less sure of what she wants in life.

Early in the movie, she buys a truck on a whim because she’s decided she wants to pursue one of her money dreams: becoming a landscaper. We can see early on that they make their financial, child-raising, and other decisions together. So when Jules buys the truck without consulting Nic, we can see decisions like this, without one partner consulting the other, creating some friction in the relationship. The family lives in a middle-class, somewhat affluent suburb of Los Angeles. Joni and Laser have a good relationship, and though each has a different birth mother, both siblings have two mothers whom they treat and love the same.

The story centers on Joni’s 18th birthday in the early summer after her senior year of high school. The story spans a couple of months, from Joni’s birthday to her first day of college. Laser is curious about their biological father and asks Joni to set up a meeting with him. Joni is less interested, but Laser tells her how important it is to him, so she inquires about setting up a meeting with the sperm donor. The sperm donor, Paul, receives a call from the bank about meeting the children. It is essential to mention this little point because we can witness firsthand the entire experience of Paul receiving the news, making his decision, and preparing himself for the meeting.

Paul is a carefree self-starter. He rides a motorcycle and uses words like “cool” and “right on” as if he were in high school, just like Joni and Laser. He dropped out of college to start and run an organic restaurant, which has been successful. He leads a life with few responsibilities, and each day brings new, exciting opportunities and adventures. The meeting between Paul, Joni, and Laser is arranged without either mom’s knowledge. Their first encounter is very awkward, and Cholodenko makes sure everyone in the audience knows it. Paul doesn’t know what to say to the children, and Joni and Laser don’t offer much. At one point, Paul says, “Isn’t that right, Laze?” and Laser immediately responds, “It’s Laser.”

The trio agrees that they want to continue the relationship and decides they need to let the moms know. From this point forward, the movie becomes all about relationships. The relationships that take center stage include Nic and Jules, Joni/Laser and Paul, and Nic/Jules and Paul. The relationship between Nic and Jules becomes increasingly strained, and, unbeknownst to him, Paul becomes a wedge that further drives them apart.

To write any more would be to give the movie away. If you are into the dynamics of relationships, particularly the relationships between family members, then this is a movie you will want to see. If you keep “waiting for something to happen,” then you might be disappointed. It’s not that this movie is without climax, but if you have expectations for what it might be, you might leave them unfulfilled. If you can take the film for what it’s worth and become invested in the characters, you will care about what happens to each of them. Ultimately, that is what Cholodenko is trying to do. All five of these people are good people with good hearts, but are not without their imperfections. Their imperfections and their bonds to each other keep the movie interesting.

Plot 9.5/10
Character Development 10/10
Character Chemistry 9/10
Acting 9/10
Screenplay 8.5/10
Directing 9/10
Cinematography 7.5/10
Sound 8.5/10
Hook and Reel 7.5/10
Universal Relevance 10/10
89.5%

A-

Movies You Might Like If You Liked This Movie

• Carol
• Parenthood
• American Beauty
• Far From Heaven
• The Squid and the Whale

Spoiler – Only read the following if you have seen the movie.

There are two situations in this movie I’d like to discuss further. The first is the affair between Paul and Jules. There wouldn’t be many people in the audience who would want this to happen, because the second this happened, we’d know how badly it would hurt Nic, Joni, and Laser if discovered. While Jules and Paul understand that this will affect the other three if this secret is found, it seems that Jules is fully aware of what she is doing, whereas Paul is not. Jules initiates this affair, and while Paul does nothing to stop it, Jules seems to have much more to lose. I wasn’t as impressed with Annette Bening’s performance as most people were (hence her Academy Award nomination and Golden Globe win). Still, I thought all of the emotions she felt and how they poured out of her with such passion after learning of the affair were very real. It’s hard for me to understand how anyone would even consider taking another person back after being hurt so badly. I know people do it, and you might not know what you would do until you are in a situation like that, but I don’t see how you don’t immediately rid yourself of that person.

The other situation is Joni’s first day of college. A situation of such magnitude brings a wave of emotions. I remember being shocked when my sister told me, during my junior year of college, that my mom cried all the way home from the moment she, my sister, and my father left after getting me set up at college my first year. Then, four years later, I saw how strong my mom was when she, my father, and I moved my sister to Virginia Tech. As we were leaving her room, my mom hugged her, gave her a big smile, and told her to call later that night, just as she had whenever she said goodbye to my sister for an extended period. But ten seconds later, as soon as she was out of sight, my mom began crying and cried the entire four hours back home. So, the scene where Nic and Jules say goodbye to Joni looks pretty heartfelt and very real. It seemed very believable that Cholodenko would end the movie with this scene, showing that the love Nic and Jules share for their children will bring them closer and how important they are to one another.